beyondpanic's diary

beyondpanic's Diaryland Diary

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I Hate Spiders

You all need to thank me ahead of time that I canít find my camera right now because of the following story. I wonít even google a picture (and there are pictures out there) for you because this is so gross.

Last night I walked into my kitchen and spotted a huge, black, fat wood spider strolling across the kitchen floor. I immediately screamed and smashed it with my daughterís sneaker which was not in the shoe box where in should have been which was the closest weapon I could find.

What the FU@K!!!!! The spider exploded into hundreds of little spiders! I swear I am not making this up, nor have I licked any LSD infused postage stamps. Apparently this type of spider carries her babies on her back and when I smashed her they all jumped off and started running around my kitchen. There were like 50 tiny spiders running around my kitchen, I tell ya!

What the FU@K!!!!!!!!!!!

For a second I was absolutely stunned and then I just started slapping the floor haphazardly killing the babies Ė while STILL not understanding what the FU@K had just happened. All of this while I was screaming at the tops of my lungs.

My daughter (Miss Smarty Pants -Going to Graduate from Penn State in December) ran into the kitchen, grabbed the sneaker and ran outside with it. She then proceeded to teach me about this particular kind of arachnid that carries her horrible spawn on her back.

What the FU@K!!!!!

Iím not stepping into that kitchen today. Some of those little buggers got away from me last night and they might be looking for a new back to jump on.

11:13 a.m. - Sunday, Jul. 26, 2009
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