beyondpanic's diary

beyondpanic's Diaryland Diary

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Yee Hah!


I am always so fascinated and horrified with how people react to free “stuff”.

Yesterday at work, the big shots had a luncheon meeting. The local caterer delivered hoagie bites, pasta and potato salad, a small veggie tray, chips, pretzels and cookies.

About an hour after management had finished picking their way thorough the food, we (the worker bees) received an email telling us to “help ourselves to the leftovers”.

How generous…metaphorically speaking, of course.

Let me tell you, if Moses could have emailed all of the Jews telling them to get the hell out of Egypt , they would have left a lot sooner.

That email wasn’t on our screens for a millisecond and suddenly the stampede began. Chairs went flying and people were literally racing each other through the cubicles in order to snag a withered carrot or a shredded end of a hoagie or a limp potato chip. I saw two women dive at the cookie tray and have a tug of war over the last chocolate chip cookie.

This morning someone brought in a bag of leftover Halloween candy. One of my coworkers started ululating “Hey everybody, there’s candy over by the coffee machine!!!”

Again, the chairs were thrown back from the desks and people were running like their lives depended on a half-melted Hershey Bar or a small bag of smashed candy corn.

I don’t get it! I’d rather go to the McDonald’s down the street and buy a cheeseburger and fries than eat anyone’s leftovers! It’s a matter of pride and my intense fear of salmonella.

I’m just saying…

Oh, thanks so much, my friends, for the positive vibes. I just do not understand what is going on with him.

8:45 p.m. - Wednesday, Nov. 12, 2008
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